Why to put someone down, when we want to pull up somebody?

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How will you praise someone? By their qualities, hobbies, looks or by their personality... How will you make them  feel that they are great? Here it goes, the comparison. "You are better than this person." If you want to climb one step up, will you pull the other person down? No, one will either wait until the person climbs up or one will go besides the other person, without hurting them. 




Sometimes, my closed ones say, "Your glow is better than her. I know she is fair, but being dark, you carry great smile, which she doesn't." To praise me, they will put someone down, which distracts me mentally a lot. We heard a lot not to compare ourselves to others. But, what if we start comparing the person to another person? Do you think it is a justice? 


We feel good, when someone says that we are better than this person, but at the same time we don't realise that we are unconsciously putting someone down. We all say that everyone is better at their place. Then why do we praise others by putting someone down? It's not just about a person, it's about everything that we are surrounded with. How does it even matter or make a difference when we compare someone with someone else? When we do this, it's like we are discouraging the person, we are not letting their vibes grow, by putting them down. So, what should we do? 




How to praise others if they feel low, without comparing to others? 

- Praise the person by reflecting how much their presence have made a difference in his/her surrounding. Make them think what would be world without them. Because every person's role make a difference in the world. 

- Show what are the positive qualities or vibes they are carrying, without comparing to others. 

- Reflect some of the changes, which they have made in their own lives. Every person learns from mistakes, due to which we adapt changes in life. 

- Show them how they have conquered some situations which was difficult to conquer them. 

- Tell them how unique or best  they are at their own place. Everyone is incomplete without each other. 




Comparison is poisonous, whether you do it for yourself or with others. Update or upgrade self and others. Never put someone down, to pull up somebody. 


Written by - Jyoti Jamlingappnavar

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